Wine Mama (57) Time Line

Kirk Carter@ WGA Copyright 2013

WINE MAMA (57)

TIME LINE

EXT: BRIAN'S HOUSE-KITCHEN-SUNDAY-10 A.M.

BRIAN PUTTING TOGETHER SOME WESTERN OMELETTES

TALKING TO SANDY WHO HAS JUST APPEARED FROM THE BEDROOM, BAREFOOT WEARING ONLY A NEW ORLEANS SAINTS LOGO SHIRT

WALKING OVER TO BRIAN, GIVING HIM A HUG AND A KISS

SANDY

"Morning Gatorboy, glad to hear you survived the great grape-napping!"

BRIAN

"If I hadn't seen the mayhem that happened right there in person, I never would have believed it...it all took place within minutes...Brown's van blowing up, trailer blowing tires, trailer tipping over spilling grapes everywhere...Brown returning fire, killing the cockroaches, whoever they were...Police still can't identify them!"

SANDY

"Why couldn't they find anything...no I.D...nothing?"

BRIAN

"Faces missing, apparently Brown blew the smile completely off their face...dental work included!"

SANDY

"So where's our grapes at?"

BRIAN

"Brown had them taken to a secured refrigerated storage area, called it perishable evidence for pending charges or something?"

SANDY

"Still can't believe those two morons are blaming you...pretty ludicrous to think that they can make accusations when the harvest was held out in the open like that...what were they thinking?"

BRIAN

"Desperation, nothing original to counter play with...hey let's all blame Brian, he's the scapegoat, of course it's me, my scheme all along, just plain stupidity...Brown says it's not going to stick anyway, because they weren't even aware of the surveillance systems in place...so wait till they find all this shit out, they'll come crawling to the D.A. for their cleansing of sin...please forgive me, as I was born an idiot!"

(BOTH LAUGHING)

SANDY

"False assumption on their part...but where does that put the grapes, I mean...time is working against us?"

BRIAN

"Yea, there are other processors, but they're in full production, doubt there's any room for us...I'll check, but I'm not feeling too optimistic about my odds here..."

SANDY

"By the way, did you ever find out what happened to Arthur?"

BRIAN

"Not a peep, keep in mind he had those forged papers, it's not that he had a real current address or social security number...what he does have is a lot of cash with him, so I'm assuming he's looked over our situation and took it on himself to exit like Snagglepuss..."

SANDY

"Who's Snagglepuss?"

BRIAN

"Oh, just a cartoon character from the sixties, pretty funny stuff!"

SANDY

"So, which way did he exit?"

BRIAN

"He was a liberal, always stage-left!

SANDY

"In that case, we may never find him?"

BRIAN

"He's either a survivor or very dead...it's either one or the other with people like him!"

SANDY

"So, was there any other good news?"

BRIAN

"The grapes are at least cleaned and dethatched!"

SANDY

"Yea, but didn't you tell me, that once you do that, the grapes lose their defense mechanism lose their source of nutrition, like losing nature's placenta or something, they just start degrading?"

BRIAN

"You get a couple of extra days, buy a little time if you can keep them chilled, but after that it kind of goes down hill pretty quickly...not a good thing...you start seeing mildew, rot, mold, all kinds of lovely stuff...like Martha Stewart once said before going to prison...Not a good thing!"

SANDY

"So, what did John have to say...by the way, these omelettes are the bomb, they're poppin...so what about John?"

BRIAN

"Thanks, got a little Jalep and some five-spice in there...it's funny, I mean it's funny now, personally I was a bit horrified at the time...but John said it was the best movie he's seen all year, he gave it five stars...how twisted is that?"

SANDY

"Yea, but it was his psychic shit, whatever he senses, that got you two to the delivery point to start with...must of really freaked him out a bit, when all the action kicked into gear, just because something he felt, something he sensed, he's like a walking GPS, creepy?"


BRIAN

"I don't think anything can freak out John...it's John that freaks me out, guy's a trip!"

SANDY

"You know, I've been thinking about this?"

BRIAN

"Sandy, how many times have I asked you to not think things out, don't be thinking like that, like out loud where people can hear your thoughts, they comprehend it as gospel...oh no, never mind, just Sandy thinking out loud again!"

SANDY

"Shut-up...listen...you know, you should force Thomson to go on head and process our grapes, even if he doesn't want to...you do have a valid contract, the percentage deal, just force him to honor it, legally he can't back out, we have nothing to lose by forcing it's effect...if he refuses and the grapes go bad, we hold legal precedence to sue his ass off...like I said, nothing to lose!"

BRIAN

"You know something...that's brilliant, you really amaze me sometimes, I'm going to do that Monday!"

SANDY

"See, I told ya...I can be more than just your "Sack Honey", I told you I could shine...I have my moments!"

BRIAN

"Okay, once in a while...but don't let great moments of vision supersede general priorities...remember, "Sack Honey" first, moments of amazing vision second, agreed?"

SANDY

"Right sir, I'll make sure to remember that, gees...almost messed up there..."

BRIAN SNEAKING UP BEHIND HER


BRIAN

"Okay, let's review...!"

GRABBING HER BY THE MID-TORSO, THROWING HER ONTO HIS SHOULDER HE MARCHES OFF TOWARD THE BEDROOM


SANDY SCREAMING

"Guess the "Sack Honey" priorities are in session now...right?"


BRIAN

"No, it was seeing a half-naked girl wearing a Saints uniform that was driving me crazy...hey, it's guy thing...must go to the infield!"

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